Christmas Presents from School

Z-Toad (1st Grade):
Z-Toad's class all mailed home Christmas Cards.   The card is entitled My Wish For You.
Z-Toad wrote:
I wish my Mom and Dad good luck (um, sure, we could use that!).  I wish Mom to Not to wev (a statement designed purely to guilt me!  He doesn't mind me leaving as long as he gets to come).   Yes or No  ( I guess I am suppose to circle and return)?   So we can b a famay (I guess it does not count as a family if the mom leaves ever as Daddy goes to work everyday and that doesn't seem to be a problem.).

J-Toad (3rd Grade):
J-Toad's class built little mini houses and they had to write about their house.
J-Toad wrote:

The House  Rated PG 13  (I am not sure what to be concerned about - That J-Toad thinks his life is a movie or that our house is not okay for those under 13 without parental supervision??)
I like my house alot (great so does the bank).  I like my house alot because of the computer room and the computer (good to know that us breathing humans are such an integral part of your life).
I like my computer because I get to play World of Warcraft, Roblox, and FusionFall.  Plus I get to sit in my epic computer chair so soft (the word "epic" will soon be banned in this house).   I also like my yard outside.  My yard is huge  (no it is not - under 1/2 acre) and it has climbing dome on it (that you have been on twice).  We also have a shed that has the lawnmower, some toys, rats (also not true - they are little field mice), and posters so it is a mess.  We also love when Mom makes something Z-Toad and I like to call brownies (they are in fact brownies - this is not some code word for something else).  Brownies are the rich chocalaty taste you'll never outgrow (perhaps a marketing future?).  Then in the computer room we have our epic Christmas tree with a ton of lights (out of the box with preinstalled lights - I must agree this invention is EPIC!).   I have 10 presents and Z-Toad has 9 because his are larger than mine (A fact that J-Toad has felt the need to point on daily to Z-Toad.  In fact, Mommy lost count and refused to do anymore shopping).  Our Christmas tree is in the basement so Dad has to get it out of there in the dark cold basement of DOOM (the basement is 1/2 finished and as far as I know nothing doom-worthy has ever occurred).  In our bedroom we have bunk beds that are so totally epic (J-Toad's bed is close to the ceiling fan so he must duck and dodge the spinning fins - a real life video game).   I have a DS that broke but I'm going to get me a DSI xl bundle hopefully (Ho Ho Ho!).  My favorite food is meatloaf but mom doesn't make it much anymore and Zachary's super glad! (guilty - I have not made it in ages cause I am old and get tired of arguing with Z-Toad to eat his dinner).  I like this story because it is so totally epic (yes, J-Toad, it is totally wicked radical, man).